2014 PGA Season
Rollercoaster Rides to Victory
On a glorious final day for both golfing and a BBQ, Bruce “Rollercoaster” Davidson shot a stellar net 74 at Northlands to overcome the season long leader, Digby “Shyster” Leigh to capture this year’s much coveted Green Jacket edging out Leigh 334 to 336. Leigh started the day with a 4 shot lead over the unpredictable “Rollercoaster” but saw his lead evaporate on the back nine. This truly was another example of the tournament being determined on the back nine on Sunday. Even though Leigh started by putting two balls in the water on the first hole, Davidson could no better than match Leigh on that hole with both players obviously feeling the pressure early in their round. Davidson struggled to an opening nine 52 while the much steadier Leigh, after his rough start, coasted to an opening nine 44 stretching his lead over Davidson. However, the obviously better conditioned Davidson showed his true competitive capacity and bore down with a very solid 41 on the back nine. Leigh feeling the pressure wilted in the heat and couldn’t hold off the charging Davidson. A very solid season for the rookie Leigh but an even more solid finish to his season from the “Rollercoaster” which netted the coveted green jacket for Davidson.
The hard charging Dale “ZZ” Borland with a stellar 74 closed the gap on both players but was a little too far back before the round to make up all that ground. Round of the day went to Larry “Ace” Brown who netted a very solid 63 on the challenging Northland track and moved up the ladder into a solid fourth place in the race, but he too was too far back to overtake the leaders. Honorable mentions to Bob “Pitbull” Garries and Kim “I’m So” Madsen, formerly known as “Cocknose,” who were very steady over the entire season and with Madsen’s gross 75 on Saturday, the pair netted very solid 65 and 68’s respectively. The two were never very far behind in the race but never really in it either. The rest were also-rans left only to anticipate next year’s race once again.
As we get everyone closer to maintaining an accurate handicap, the race for the coveted green jacket gets more and more interesting every year. With a few tweaks to the scoring system, next year should be very interesting indeed.
Birdies Galore
This season’s birdie race was captured by Kim “I’m So” Madsen with a total of 8 birdies, an average of one per round. He was hotly persued by “ZZ Top” Borland with 7 and close on their tails was the surprising Peter Sidonio with 6. Had Peter played all 8 rounds, he would have given the two stars a run for their money. One only wonders why Peter wasn’t one of the leaders in the coveted green jacket race with that kind of potential. Interestingly, the tour’s final event at Northlands surrendered the most birdies of any event this year. Obviously, players were peaking at the right time. Congratulations to Mr. Madsen!
BBQ Bits
Again, many thanks to the Killeens who volunteered their house for the yearend BBQ, an undoubtably remarkable success on several fronts. The food was excellent, the weather was perfect, the wives were spectacular, the conversation was intelligent and enlightening (maybe not) and we had the best attendance in years. The prize table was a little different this year with everyone receiving their own PGA monogrammed shirt; so everyone was a winner! Other prizes were drawn from the hat with chances allocated according to the number of times individuals won at events this year. Everyone’s name was in the hat for being a member of the PGA and each time during the year that someone was awarded a prize for low net or KP, their name was entered into the hat once again. Grand prize winner for the evening was Murray “Fore” White who will receive the tax receipt for this year’s designated charity, The First Tee. The approximately $500 was collected from the leftovers after our beers at the end of each event. Many thanks to everyone for their generosity during the year and let’s put to rest the myth of how miserly those accountants and teachers are! Well done, Gentlemen.
Onward to 2015
May everyone have a very healthy and productive off season and let’s make this happen again next year. Remember, to make the PGA successful takes everyone’s involvement and commitment so get involved, stay involved and take your turn to help out. A survey will be out in the next few weeks so keep in mind any improvements you might suggest.
On a glorious final day for both golfing and a BBQ, Bruce “Rollercoaster” Davidson shot a stellar net 74 at Northlands to overcome the season long leader, Digby “Shyster” Leigh to capture this year’s much coveted Green Jacket edging out Leigh 334 to 336. Leigh started the day with a 4 shot lead over the unpredictable “Rollercoaster” but saw his lead evaporate on the back nine. This truly was another example of the tournament being determined on the back nine on Sunday. Even though Leigh started by putting two balls in the water on the first hole, Davidson could no better than match Leigh on that hole with both players obviously feeling the pressure early in their round. Davidson struggled to an opening nine 52 while the much steadier Leigh, after his rough start, coasted to an opening nine 44 stretching his lead over Davidson. However, the obviously better conditioned Davidson showed his true competitive capacity and bore down with a very solid 41 on the back nine. Leigh feeling the pressure wilted in the heat and couldn’t hold off the charging Davidson. A very solid season for the rookie Leigh but an even more solid finish to his season from the “Rollercoaster” which netted the coveted green jacket for Davidson.
The hard charging Dale “ZZ” Borland with a stellar 74 closed the gap on both players but was a little too far back before the round to make up all that ground. Round of the day went to Larry “Ace” Brown who netted a very solid 63 on the challenging Northland track and moved up the ladder into a solid fourth place in the race, but he too was too far back to overtake the leaders. Honorable mentions to Bob “Pitbull” Garries and Kim “I’m So” Madsen, formerly known as “Cocknose,” who were very steady over the entire season and with Madsen’s gross 75 on Saturday, the pair netted very solid 65 and 68’s respectively. The two were never very far behind in the race but never really in it either. The rest were also-rans left only to anticipate next year’s race once again.
As we get everyone closer to maintaining an accurate handicap, the race for the coveted green jacket gets more and more interesting every year. With a few tweaks to the scoring system, next year should be very interesting indeed.
Birdies Galore
This season’s birdie race was captured by Kim “I’m So” Madsen with a total of 8 birdies, an average of one per round. He was hotly persued by “ZZ Top” Borland with 7 and close on their tails was the surprising Peter Sidonio with 6. Had Peter played all 8 rounds, he would have given the two stars a run for their money. One only wonders why Peter wasn’t one of the leaders in the coveted green jacket race with that kind of potential. Interestingly, the tour’s final event at Northlands surrendered the most birdies of any event this year. Obviously, players were peaking at the right time. Congratulations to Mr. Madsen!
BBQ Bits
Again, many thanks to the Killeens who volunteered their house for the yearend BBQ, an undoubtably remarkable success on several fronts. The food was excellent, the weather was perfect, the wives were spectacular, the conversation was intelligent and enlightening (maybe not) and we had the best attendance in years. The prize table was a little different this year with everyone receiving their own PGA monogrammed shirt; so everyone was a winner! Other prizes were drawn from the hat with chances allocated according to the number of times individuals won at events this year. Everyone’s name was in the hat for being a member of the PGA and each time during the year that someone was awarded a prize for low net or KP, their name was entered into the hat once again. Grand prize winner for the evening was Murray “Fore” White who will receive the tax receipt for this year’s designated charity, The First Tee. The approximately $500 was collected from the leftovers after our beers at the end of each event. Many thanks to everyone for their generosity during the year and let’s put to rest the myth of how miserly those accountants and teachers are! Well done, Gentlemen.
Onward to 2015
May everyone have a very healthy and productive off season and let’s make this happen again next year. Remember, to make the PGA successful takes everyone’s involvement and commitment so get involved, stay involved and take your turn to help out. A survey will be out in the next few weeks so keep in mind any improvements you might suggest.
Whelps Whip Wankers
In a battle that turned out to be must closer than the early morning Sunday scores indicated, the Whelps imposed their superiority on the much better looking Wankers by beating them 28.5 to 25.5 in the annual two day Tripper Cup at Crowne Isle. After the Wankers 9.5 to 8.5 opening day lead in the pairs matches, the Whelps jumped on the Wankers early in the second round. The early matches went soundly in the Whelps favor but the strong finish from the Wankers was too little, too late. Captain Sherk’s wits were outmatched by Captain Leigh’s on the final day’s. strategy. Winners on the twelve man Whelps will receive their prizes at the final day wrap up where they will once again get to rub it into the disheartened Wankers. But being the gentlemen they are, the Wankers graciously acknowledge they were defeated by the better team on the two days.
Crowne Isle
Early feedback from the weekend was very positive about the accommodations and the golf course. The restaurant, lodging and course all in the same location worked very well for the group. And even though the banquet room on the Saturday evening was a little too tight and not properly staffed, the evening itself was full of laughs and fun. Larry and Paul did an outstanding job with the prizes and draws and many thanks to Larry for supplying the bottle of Chivas in the draw! Something to keep in out memory banks for the future.
One drawback was the slow round on the Saturday which ultimately put Paul “Clubtoss” Killeen over the edge. His vocal chords were exercised to the extreme on only the 3rd hole - a new record for the earliest hole on the course for the stackhole to blow. Killeen never recovered as demonstrated by his score. However, later in the round, he managed to equal the Olympic and World records for the 5 iron club toss. The cagey veteran that he is, however, he did manage to exhibit enough self control to toss the club forward - a note to all you young, less wily club tossers - always toss your clubs forward. You never want to return to retrieve a club. Killeen’s lack of recovery from his early blowup was probably the determining factor in the Wankers ultimate loss.
We also learned that we need to have a room or meeting point somewhere on the Friday night so everyone can be updated on tee times and groupings for the following day. Those who arrive on Saturday are just getting to the course regardless. Next year!
Green Jacket Race - Leigh Overtaken
There is a race for the coveted Green Jacket and the sandbagging Digby Leigh is no longer the front runner. A new sandbagger has quietly emerged from the pack. Bruce “Rollercoaster” Davidson seems to have leveled out the highs on his roller coaster game and settled into the low mode. His net 63, 67 on the weekend edged out Mumbles extraordinary weekend rounds of 65, 67 for best rounds of the weekend. The weekend scores put Mumbles back into the main pack and shot Davidson right to the top, overcoming Leigh’s seemingly insurmountable early lead. The amount of sand these two “gentlemen”, Davidson and Leigh, are packing around could be used to divert the Fraser River. It will be too bad that their handicaps will plummet so severely for the next event, that even they will have trouble shooting in the low net 60’s. Careful consideration will be given to whether or not we want the two green jacket leaders in the same Calcutta group just to watch the competition unfold on the day or whether we can trust them to shoot scores that are more closely aligned with their “true” handicaps.
These two are really the only ones vying for the coveted Green Jacket unless they both have monumental collapses and someone else shoots a sandbagging score at the final event on June 21 at Northlands. We need to remember that the final round has to count; it is Northlands and the two of them are capable of shooting big numbers at that course. Could there be someone who comes from nowhere? “It ain’t over until Hugh Taylor sings!”
Green Jacket Race
Best 4 scores, in alphabetic order
ALEXANDER Dave 279
BORLAND, Dale 274
BROWN Larry 281
BURNS Dick 282
CAIN, Steve 282
DAVIDSON, Bruce 262
GARRIES, Bob 281
GOULDING, Alan 284
GRUNDY Vic 280
KILLEEN, Paul 300
LEIGH, Digby 265
MADSEN, Kim 280
ODENDAAL, Louie 291
OSTEREICHER, Richard 285
SHERK Ken 294
SIDONIO Peter 284
TAYLOR, Hugh 279
VOLPATTI, Alex 290
WALTERS Fred 283
In a battle that turned out to be must closer than the early morning Sunday scores indicated, the Whelps imposed their superiority on the much better looking Wankers by beating them 28.5 to 25.5 in the annual two day Tripper Cup at Crowne Isle. After the Wankers 9.5 to 8.5 opening day lead in the pairs matches, the Whelps jumped on the Wankers early in the second round. The early matches went soundly in the Whelps favor but the strong finish from the Wankers was too little, too late. Captain Sherk’s wits were outmatched by Captain Leigh’s on the final day’s. strategy. Winners on the twelve man Whelps will receive their prizes at the final day wrap up where they will once again get to rub it into the disheartened Wankers. But being the gentlemen they are, the Wankers graciously acknowledge they were defeated by the better team on the two days.
Crowne Isle
Early feedback from the weekend was very positive about the accommodations and the golf course. The restaurant, lodging and course all in the same location worked very well for the group. And even though the banquet room on the Saturday evening was a little too tight and not properly staffed, the evening itself was full of laughs and fun. Larry and Paul did an outstanding job with the prizes and draws and many thanks to Larry for supplying the bottle of Chivas in the draw! Something to keep in out memory banks for the future.
One drawback was the slow round on the Saturday which ultimately put Paul “Clubtoss” Killeen over the edge. His vocal chords were exercised to the extreme on only the 3rd hole - a new record for the earliest hole on the course for the stackhole to blow. Killeen never recovered as demonstrated by his score. However, later in the round, he managed to equal the Olympic and World records for the 5 iron club toss. The cagey veteran that he is, however, he did manage to exhibit enough self control to toss the club forward - a note to all you young, less wily club tossers - always toss your clubs forward. You never want to return to retrieve a club. Killeen’s lack of recovery from his early blowup was probably the determining factor in the Wankers ultimate loss.
We also learned that we need to have a room or meeting point somewhere on the Friday night so everyone can be updated on tee times and groupings for the following day. Those who arrive on Saturday are just getting to the course regardless. Next year!
Green Jacket Race - Leigh Overtaken
There is a race for the coveted Green Jacket and the sandbagging Digby Leigh is no longer the front runner. A new sandbagger has quietly emerged from the pack. Bruce “Rollercoaster” Davidson seems to have leveled out the highs on his roller coaster game and settled into the low mode. His net 63, 67 on the weekend edged out Mumbles extraordinary weekend rounds of 65, 67 for best rounds of the weekend. The weekend scores put Mumbles back into the main pack and shot Davidson right to the top, overcoming Leigh’s seemingly insurmountable early lead. The amount of sand these two “gentlemen”, Davidson and Leigh, are packing around could be used to divert the Fraser River. It will be too bad that their handicaps will plummet so severely for the next event, that even they will have trouble shooting in the low net 60’s. Careful consideration will be given to whether or not we want the two green jacket leaders in the same Calcutta group just to watch the competition unfold on the day or whether we can trust them to shoot scores that are more closely aligned with their “true” handicaps.
These two are really the only ones vying for the coveted Green Jacket unless they both have monumental collapses and someone else shoots a sandbagging score at the final event on June 21 at Northlands. We need to remember that the final round has to count; it is Northlands and the two of them are capable of shooting big numbers at that course. Could there be someone who comes from nowhere? “It ain’t over until Hugh Taylor sings!”
Green Jacket Race
Best 4 scores, in alphabetic order
ALEXANDER Dave 279
BORLAND, Dale 274
BROWN Larry 281
BURNS Dick 282
CAIN, Steve 282
DAVIDSON, Bruce 262
GARRIES, Bob 281
GOULDING, Alan 284
GRUNDY Vic 280
KILLEEN, Paul 300
LEIGH, Digby 265
MADSEN, Kim 280
ODENDAAL, Louie 291
OSTEREICHER, Richard 285
SHERK Ken 294
SIDONIO Peter 284
TAYLOR, Hugh 279
VOLPATTI, Alex 290
WALTERS Fred 283
Tripper Cup
The teams for Crowne Isle are set with Captains and assistants in place. The teams are based on handicap averages with both teams having about the same handicap average of 17. This includes Leigh’s sandbagging 19 but his real number is totally unknown and if he shoots another net in the low 60’s, his handicap will be severely adjusted on the Saturday evening before round 2. The pairings will be set by the captains on Friday evening with Captain Sherk setting up his first pair then Captain Leigh will follow with his pairing in response. Leigh will then put out his second group and Sherk will then respond with his matchup. The pattern will repeat until all foursomes are finalized.
The first day’s competition will feature two-ball best ball within the groups with two points available on each hole - low net versus low net and second ball versus second ball for a total of two points on each hole. Each group can gain 3 points in total for the match: 1 point for winning the front 9, 1 point for winning the back 9, and 1 point for winning the overall. Ties are no points. 18 total points are available on Saturday’s competition.
Sunday’s action will be high pressure singles with 36 total points available for the team. The groupings will be set by the captains on Saturday night with blind pairings. The captains will formulate their strategy arranging the order of their individuals for the matches and the opponents will be revealed one at a time in the order that they have been arranged.
The Wankers will be lead by Ken “Tommy Bahamas” Sherk ably assisted by Kim “I’m So” Madsen. The Whelps will be captained by Digby “The Shyster” Leigh aided by Freddy “Flintstone” Walters.
Team Sherk (Madsen) - The Wankers
Madsen 7
White 33
Burns 10
Ostereicher 22
Garries 13
Volpatti 21
Cain 15
Sherk 20
Taylor 15
Sidonio 19
Brown 16
Maynard 17
Team Leigh (Walters) - The Whelps
Borland 8
Odendaal 29
Carter 11
Davidson 21
Grundy 15
Alexander 21
Killeen 15
Goulding 19
Walters 16
Leigh 19?
Mackenzie 17
Ambercrombie 13
( In the event of only 23 players, on day 1the solo on the Wankers will be paired blindly with another Wanker to create a grouping of approximately equivalent handicaps and the team score will be determined at the end of the round. Similarly, on Sunday the solo will play a blind match against an opponent with the same approximate handicap and the results calculated at the end of the round.)
The teams for Crowne Isle are set with Captains and assistants in place. The teams are based on handicap averages with both teams having about the same handicap average of 17. This includes Leigh’s sandbagging 19 but his real number is totally unknown and if he shoots another net in the low 60’s, his handicap will be severely adjusted on the Saturday evening before round 2. The pairings will be set by the captains on Friday evening with Captain Sherk setting up his first pair then Captain Leigh will follow with his pairing in response. Leigh will then put out his second group and Sherk will then respond with his matchup. The pattern will repeat until all foursomes are finalized.
The first day’s competition will feature two-ball best ball within the groups with two points available on each hole - low net versus low net and second ball versus second ball for a total of two points on each hole. Each group can gain 3 points in total for the match: 1 point for winning the front 9, 1 point for winning the back 9, and 1 point for winning the overall. Ties are no points. 18 total points are available on Saturday’s competition.
Sunday’s action will be high pressure singles with 36 total points available for the team. The groupings will be set by the captains on Saturday night with blind pairings. The captains will formulate their strategy arranging the order of their individuals for the matches and the opponents will be revealed one at a time in the order that they have been arranged.
The Wankers will be lead by Ken “Tommy Bahamas” Sherk ably assisted by Kim “I’m So” Madsen. The Whelps will be captained by Digby “The Shyster” Leigh aided by Freddy “Flintstone” Walters.
Team Sherk (Madsen) - The Wankers
Madsen 7
White 33
Burns 10
Ostereicher 22
Garries 13
Volpatti 21
Cain 15
Sherk 20
Taylor 15
Sidonio 19
Brown 16
Maynard 17
Team Leigh (Walters) - The Whelps
Borland 8
Odendaal 29
Carter 11
Davidson 21
Grundy 15
Alexander 21
Killeen 15
Goulding 19
Walters 16
Leigh 19?
Mackenzie 17
Ambercrombie 13
( In the event of only 23 players, on day 1the solo on the Wankers will be paired blindly with another Wanker to create a grouping of approximately equivalent handicaps and the team score will be determined at the end of the round. Similarly, on Sunday the solo will play a blind match against an opponent with the same approximate handicap and the results calculated at the end of the round.)
The Shootout at Squamish
On another great day for golf, the cream rose to the top with a new event for the PGA. Chicago proved to be a challenge for the boys as few of them got their heads back to the surface. The man who was almost disqualified for the first event at Squamish as he was late for his tee time was the one who rose above the rest of us to a score of +5. His net 63 was the best of the day and should drive his handicap lower minimizing the chances for a repeat win. The amazingly steady Larry “Ace” Brown was close behind with a net 66 creeps closer to the top of the Green Jacket leaderboard. Bruce “Rollercoaster” Davidson put in another solid round with a net 69. So his complaints about the color of the tee choice falls silently on deaf ears!
However, the team event was captured by the highly esteemed group of Madsen, Borland, Garries and Burns whose team score was the only one that ended above the freezing point. What happened to the rest of you out there? Everyone of the groups had at least one anchor that kept them below the surface and Digby wasn’t there to counterbalance everyone else’s honesty!
The other big prize winner for the day with his shot of skill was the guest Al Goulding who was replacing Doug Player who was replacing Steve Cain - you figure it out! And the sad story of the afternoon was Alex “in the details” Volpatti who intimately familiarized himself with the rough and the trees on the day but got to replace some of the balls he misplaced by being awarded a booby prize dozen. He narrowly edged out the obviously injured Ken “Hair” Sherk and the almost as dreadful Paul “Chairman Mao” Killeen for the most pathetic golfer on the day.
Thanks to John Mackenzie for filling in for Digby Leigh and replacing the sandbagger with an honest golfer who had the good grace to not visit the prize table. John will be a welcome addition to us on the Tripper Cup at Crowne Isle having set the table for a much improved round.
Race To The Green Jacket Tightens!
As the tour rounds the corner heading toward the last lap and most critical section of the season, the race for the Green Jacket has tightened. Although the sandbagging Leigh still has his hands firmly grasping the reins for the race, his overwhelming lead is no longer so overwhelming. There remains hope for a few golfers. Although Leigh remains a full 6 shots clear of the pack, Dale “ZZ Top” is now visible in Leigh’s rearview mirror. Larry “In The Weeds” Brown has been amazingly consistent all season and is not out of the race only another 4 strokes behind Borland. The rest of us are in the land of mediocrity with only the slightest hint of re-entering the race.Leading the pack of the mediocre is Hugh “Dogballs” Taylor followed closely by Bob “Pitbull” Garries. It will take 4 solid rounds and a bit of a collapse from the leaders for any of these or the other also rans to reappear, but as the saying goes, “ the real race doesn’t begin until the back nine on Sunday. The Calcutta at Northlands will be a counter for everyone so the winner could be a shocker. The race isn’t over until Hugh Taylor sings.
Green Jacket Standings
Leigh 271
Borland 277
Brown 281
Taylor 285
Garries 286
Madsen 288
Sidonio 288
Walters 288
Player/Goulding 289
Alexander 290
Burns 290
Grundy 291
Player 292
Davidson 293
Ostereicher 296
Cain 299
Volpatti 304
Sherk 315
On another great day for golf, the cream rose to the top with a new event for the PGA. Chicago proved to be a challenge for the boys as few of them got their heads back to the surface. The man who was almost disqualified for the first event at Squamish as he was late for his tee time was the one who rose above the rest of us to a score of +5. His net 63 was the best of the day and should drive his handicap lower minimizing the chances for a repeat win. The amazingly steady Larry “Ace” Brown was close behind with a net 66 creeps closer to the top of the Green Jacket leaderboard. Bruce “Rollercoaster” Davidson put in another solid round with a net 69. So his complaints about the color of the tee choice falls silently on deaf ears!
However, the team event was captured by the highly esteemed group of Madsen, Borland, Garries and Burns whose team score was the only one that ended above the freezing point. What happened to the rest of you out there? Everyone of the groups had at least one anchor that kept them below the surface and Digby wasn’t there to counterbalance everyone else’s honesty!
The other big prize winner for the day with his shot of skill was the guest Al Goulding who was replacing Doug Player who was replacing Steve Cain - you figure it out! And the sad story of the afternoon was Alex “in the details” Volpatti who intimately familiarized himself with the rough and the trees on the day but got to replace some of the balls he misplaced by being awarded a booby prize dozen. He narrowly edged out the obviously injured Ken “Hair” Sherk and the almost as dreadful Paul “Chairman Mao” Killeen for the most pathetic golfer on the day.
Thanks to John Mackenzie for filling in for Digby Leigh and replacing the sandbagger with an honest golfer who had the good grace to not visit the prize table. John will be a welcome addition to us on the Tripper Cup at Crowne Isle having set the table for a much improved round.
Race To The Green Jacket Tightens!
As the tour rounds the corner heading toward the last lap and most critical section of the season, the race for the Green Jacket has tightened. Although the sandbagging Leigh still has his hands firmly grasping the reins for the race, his overwhelming lead is no longer so overwhelming. There remains hope for a few golfers. Although Leigh remains a full 6 shots clear of the pack, Dale “ZZ Top” is now visible in Leigh’s rearview mirror. Larry “In The Weeds” Brown has been amazingly consistent all season and is not out of the race only another 4 strokes behind Borland. The rest of us are in the land of mediocrity with only the slightest hint of re-entering the race.Leading the pack of the mediocre is Hugh “Dogballs” Taylor followed closely by Bob “Pitbull” Garries. It will take 4 solid rounds and a bit of a collapse from the leaders for any of these or the other also rans to reappear, but as the saying goes, “ the real race doesn’t begin until the back nine on Sunday. The Calcutta at Northlands will be a counter for everyone so the winner could be a shocker. The race isn’t over until Hugh Taylor sings.
Green Jacket Standings
Leigh 271
Borland 277
Brown 281
Taylor 285
Garries 286
Madsen 288
Sidonio 288
Walters 288
Player/Goulding 289
Alexander 290
Burns 290
Grundy 291
Player 292
Davidson 293
Ostereicher 296
Cain 299
Volpatti 304
Sherk 315
This special write up must be read very carefully as the Amazing Kreskin tries to explain the new Pink Ball rules
From The Fringe
Leigh Continues To Widen Gap
The fat lady is warming up her vocal chords in the race for the coveted green jacket! Once again Digby Leigh continues to baffle the handicappers by scoring another unbelievably low net round of 62 when the next lowest round was Louis O’s net 66 and no one else even broke 70. Even Ripleys is not believing Leigh’s handicap. The oldtimers are pining for the day when no one ever won two events in a row much less three out of four rounds. As a result of his obviously sandbagging handicap, Leigh is a full lap in front of his next closest competitor Freddy “In The Weeds” Walters who is a full 19 strokes behind the cheating Leigh. Lurking close behind Walters is the steady Pitbull Garries and the silent but violent Larry Brown and Vic “Numbers” Grundy. The race for second is a true race! Leigh is even attempting to divert pressure away from himself and his newly purchased good golf game by not showing up for the next event. Thank you Digby for that little bit of graciousness and giving the rest of us one shot at glory for a day.
All of you who have played fewer than your 4 rounds could still be in the mix. After our next event, we will be throwing out one bad round for everyone and the race for second should start to be clarified.
Pink Balls Galore!
The usual group who have been making regular trips to the prize table were at it once again this week. Leigh, Grundy, Walters and Cain (is that not the name of a very shady organization?) were once again putting their greedy hands into the prize pot. What do they need all those golf balls for if they don’t lose any? They returned to the clubhouse with 3 of their balls and despite the fact that the highly esteemed group of Burns, Taylor, Player and Odendaal returned with 4 balls, the crafty Leigh somehow managed to lawyer his way into first place just because one of the 4 balls returned by the Burns group was not their own. They should at least have been given some recognition and respect for their eagle eyes and the amount of time they spent looking for errant balls. Somehow low net on the pink ball was worked into the winning calculations and not the traditional who kept the ball the longest.
A new wrinkle was added to the pink ball game this year thanks to the always thinking and never shirking Ken Sherk. Basically, the same rules applied but each team started with four balls and the team which had the most balls at the end of the round was awarded the win. It was a good mutation of the original game since it kept most teams playing the pink ball until the last hole other than the not so vaunted team of Garries, Brown, Watt and White who obviously have an aversion to pink and left all of their balls on the course. They now will be know as the eunichs. It’s about time that someone neutered Pitbull who needed some neutering on the day.
Outside The Ropes
Dale Borland was the winner of both the real golf competitions by having the low gross for the day with a cool 78 and by winning the KP competition on the 16th. Well done ZZ. You are confirmation that lookin’ good on the course makes you play good. All others please take note, especially Alex who somehow thinks that green is a particularly lovely shade of pink!
Around the Table
Our chosen charity for the year will be the First Tee of Vancouver organization which fits well with our charitable aims of keeping our donations within the community towards something that is meaningful to all of us. This organization provides opportunities to disadvantaged kids and not only exposes them to the game of golf but also exposes them to all the values of the game. Our donation this year will be more limited this year than it has been in the past as more of the money we raise will go right back into serving the needs within the group.
Next match is May 24th at Squamish. Remember, practice is highly overrated!
Leigh Continues To Widen Gap
The fat lady is warming up her vocal chords in the race for the coveted green jacket! Once again Digby Leigh continues to baffle the handicappers by scoring another unbelievably low net round of 62 when the next lowest round was Louis O’s net 66 and no one else even broke 70. Even Ripleys is not believing Leigh’s handicap. The oldtimers are pining for the day when no one ever won two events in a row much less three out of four rounds. As a result of his obviously sandbagging handicap, Leigh is a full lap in front of his next closest competitor Freddy “In The Weeds” Walters who is a full 19 strokes behind the cheating Leigh. Lurking close behind Walters is the steady Pitbull Garries and the silent but violent Larry Brown and Vic “Numbers” Grundy. The race for second is a true race! Leigh is even attempting to divert pressure away from himself and his newly purchased good golf game by not showing up for the next event. Thank you Digby for that little bit of graciousness and giving the rest of us one shot at glory for a day.
All of you who have played fewer than your 4 rounds could still be in the mix. After our next event, we will be throwing out one bad round for everyone and the race for second should start to be clarified.
Pink Balls Galore!
The usual group who have been making regular trips to the prize table were at it once again this week. Leigh, Grundy, Walters and Cain (is that not the name of a very shady organization?) were once again putting their greedy hands into the prize pot. What do they need all those golf balls for if they don’t lose any? They returned to the clubhouse with 3 of their balls and despite the fact that the highly esteemed group of Burns, Taylor, Player and Odendaal returned with 4 balls, the crafty Leigh somehow managed to lawyer his way into first place just because one of the 4 balls returned by the Burns group was not their own. They should at least have been given some recognition and respect for their eagle eyes and the amount of time they spent looking for errant balls. Somehow low net on the pink ball was worked into the winning calculations and not the traditional who kept the ball the longest.
A new wrinkle was added to the pink ball game this year thanks to the always thinking and never shirking Ken Sherk. Basically, the same rules applied but each team started with four balls and the team which had the most balls at the end of the round was awarded the win. It was a good mutation of the original game since it kept most teams playing the pink ball until the last hole other than the not so vaunted team of Garries, Brown, Watt and White who obviously have an aversion to pink and left all of their balls on the course. They now will be know as the eunichs. It’s about time that someone neutered Pitbull who needed some neutering on the day.
Outside The Ropes
Dale Borland was the winner of both the real golf competitions by having the low gross for the day with a cool 78 and by winning the KP competition on the 16th. Well done ZZ. You are confirmation that lookin’ good on the course makes you play good. All others please take note, especially Alex who somehow thinks that green is a particularly lovely shade of pink!
Around the Table
Our chosen charity for the year will be the First Tee of Vancouver organization which fits well with our charitable aims of keeping our donations within the community towards something that is meaningful to all of us. This organization provides opportunities to disadvantaged kids and not only exposes them to the game of golf but also exposes them to all the values of the game. Our donation this year will be more limited this year than it has been in the past as more of the money we raise will go right back into serving the needs within the group.
Next match is May 24th at Squamish. Remember, practice is highly overrated!
The Northlands Pink Ball Challenge
Here are the foursomes for the next game and the Group handicap from before the last game.
First Tee Sherk(22), Volpatti(23), Alexander(21) and Madsen(7)
Second Tee Davidson(23), Borland(8), Sidonio(20), Ostereicher(24)
Third Tee Grundy(17), Walters(18), Leigh(23), Cain(17)
Fourth Tee Burns(11), Taylor(17), Player(19), Odendaal(32)
Fifth Tee Garries(14), Brown(18), Watt(14), White(36)
The game is going to be Pink Ball
Rules
First Tee Sherk(22), Volpatti(23), Alexander(21) and Madsen(7)
Second Tee Davidson(23), Borland(8), Sidonio(20), Ostereicher(24)
Third Tee Grundy(17), Walters(18), Leigh(23), Cain(17)
Fourth Tee Burns(11), Taylor(17), Player(19), Odendaal(32)
Fifth Tee Garries(14), Brown(18), Watt(14), White(36)
The game is going to be Pink Ball
Rules
- Each Team starts with one Pink Ball.
- One player on each team must use the Pink Ball for a complete hole.
- The Pink Ball must rotate between the players on each team in the same order. 2 players will play the Pink Ball a total of 5 times each, while the other 2 players on the team will play the Pink Ball a total of 4 times each assuming they keep their ball to the end.
- The winning team will be the team that still has the Pink Ball at the end of 18 holes.
- If no team has the Pink Ball by the end of the round, the team that kept the Pink Ball in play without losing the ball for the most holes wins.
- If two teams are tied at the end of the round (either after 18 holes or some other hole where the ball was lost), then the winning team will be the one that has the best net score of the players when it was their turn to play the Pink Ball.
- Therefore, the team captain will need to record the net score of the player who played the Pink Ball on each hole.
- Teams will have no more than 2 minutes to search for their Pink Ball if the Pink Ball is hit into the rough or out of bounds. This is a public course, so we need to keep up the pace of play.
Par For The Course
Leigh Takes Commanding Lead in the Race for the Coveted Green Jacket
On a great day for golf in the sunny Squamish Valley, The Digger shows that he is in full control of his newly purchased golf swing. His smirk was fully evident at the post match roundtable. Bruce “The Stealth” Davidson, with an amazing, almost flawless net 63, was only able to just keep pace with the sandbagger Leigh. At least Bruce had the decency to shoot two normal rounds off his high handicap prior to his exceptional round at Squamish. With his net 63, Leigh has now taken a firm grasp on the race for the green jacket. His net 210 is a full 9 stokes better than his next closest competitors the Messers Brown and Grundy at 219. Freddy “The Flinstone” Walters, Bob “The Pitbull” Garries and Kim “I’m So” Madsen are hanging in there in the low 220’s. Dale “ZZ Top” Borland is lying in the weeds with only two counting rounds so he could jump in right out of nowhere. Watch out for snakes in the grass to those of you on the leaderboard. The rest of us are also rans at this point but as the saying goes, it’s never over until the wolf howls again.
Bruce Davidson justifiably won the match of the day - Wolf - with 14 wolf points, but his wolfcry itself was woeful - more like a wimpering ewe than a wolf. Bob Garries was in very close pursuit with 13 wolf points and accolades for his very manly wolf howl. At least we knew he was on the course.
Borland edged out Burns to win the KP contest with what must have been a magnificent shot on number 16. But the hole of the day must have been Shakey’s performance on 16 where he also meekly, not manly, wolfed the 16th hole and put his tee shot a good 40 feet from the flag and calmly sunk the putt to win the wolf points.
Dale Borland’s gross 74 has been the round of the year so far although Kim “I’m So” Madsen’s 77 at King’s Links under trying conditions is right there, as well.
Bad management of the day went to Dave “Outerlimits” Alexander who managed to show up late for his tee time thus upsetting the universal order for all of us who had mediocre rounds. At least he had the decency to follow up his tardiness with the day’s worst round. You are invited to reenter our world at any time, Dave... er maybe not!
Pitter Putter
Squamish proved to be another excellent venue. The course was in outstanding condition and the staff were very hospitable as usual. Everyone seemed eager to return there for another event this season. Wolf was another success with its slight change in format from previous years. It caused the members of each group to mix and interact with different partners on each hole and and the new scoring system kept everyone in the matches, although, the accountants had it figured out very quickly that if ecveeryone wolfed every hole, then each would end up with 13 points. the only separation would be those who won the wolf holes.
Thanks to everyone for your generosity at the table after the round. We continue to be able to put away a bit towards the charity after every round. Speaking of that, your executive will meet in the near future to make an executive decision regarding the specifics of this year’s charity after listening to your feedback up to now.
Next Event: Northlands on May 10
Leigh Takes Commanding Lead in the Race for the Coveted Green Jacket
On a great day for golf in the sunny Squamish Valley, The Digger shows that he is in full control of his newly purchased golf swing. His smirk was fully evident at the post match roundtable. Bruce “The Stealth” Davidson, with an amazing, almost flawless net 63, was only able to just keep pace with the sandbagger Leigh. At least Bruce had the decency to shoot two normal rounds off his high handicap prior to his exceptional round at Squamish. With his net 63, Leigh has now taken a firm grasp on the race for the green jacket. His net 210 is a full 9 stokes better than his next closest competitors the Messers Brown and Grundy at 219. Freddy “The Flinstone” Walters, Bob “The Pitbull” Garries and Kim “I’m So” Madsen are hanging in there in the low 220’s. Dale “ZZ Top” Borland is lying in the weeds with only two counting rounds so he could jump in right out of nowhere. Watch out for snakes in the grass to those of you on the leaderboard. The rest of us are also rans at this point but as the saying goes, it’s never over until the wolf howls again.
Bruce Davidson justifiably won the match of the day - Wolf - with 14 wolf points, but his wolfcry itself was woeful - more like a wimpering ewe than a wolf. Bob Garries was in very close pursuit with 13 wolf points and accolades for his very manly wolf howl. At least we knew he was on the course.
Borland edged out Burns to win the KP contest with what must have been a magnificent shot on number 16. But the hole of the day must have been Shakey’s performance on 16 where he also meekly, not manly, wolfed the 16th hole and put his tee shot a good 40 feet from the flag and calmly sunk the putt to win the wolf points.
Dale Borland’s gross 74 has been the round of the year so far although Kim “I’m So” Madsen’s 77 at King’s Links under trying conditions is right there, as well.
Bad management of the day went to Dave “Outerlimits” Alexander who managed to show up late for his tee time thus upsetting the universal order for all of us who had mediocre rounds. At least he had the decency to follow up his tardiness with the day’s worst round. You are invited to reenter our world at any time, Dave... er maybe not!
Pitter Putter
Squamish proved to be another excellent venue. The course was in outstanding condition and the staff were very hospitable as usual. Everyone seemed eager to return there for another event this season. Wolf was another success with its slight change in format from previous years. It caused the members of each group to mix and interact with different partners on each hole and and the new scoring system kept everyone in the matches, although, the accountants had it figured out very quickly that if ecveeryone wolfed every hole, then each would end up with 13 points. the only separation would be those who won the wolf holes.
Thanks to everyone for your generosity at the table after the round. We continue to be able to put away a bit towards the charity after every round. Speaking of that, your executive will meet in the near future to make an executive decision regarding the specifics of this year’s charity after listening to your feedback up to now.
Next Event: Northlands on May 10
Next On Tee - Squamish Golf and Country Club - Saturday, April 26
This week's event will be played at Squamish Golf and Country Club with the first tee time at 11:00 am. Could we have everyone arrive by no later than 10:30 to ensure everything is in order. There is a driving range there and small putting and chipping facilities. It is a flat course so relatively easy to walk but carts will be available.
Groups
First Tee Time Sherk(21) Grundy(17), Garries(9), Abercrombie(11)
Second Tee Time Taylor(16) Maynard(17), Player(19), Alexander(21)
Third Tee Time Davidson(24) Volpatti(23), Burns(11), Cain(17)
Fourth Tee Time Borland(9), Walter(18), Watt(?), Comer(11)
Fifth Tee Time Madsen(7), Sidonio(20), Leigh(25), Brown(17)
Bold name in each group is captain. Please ensure everyone in the group knows the rules of the game
This week's event will be played at Squamish Golf and Country Club with the first tee time at 11:00 am. Could we have everyone arrive by no later than 10:30 to ensure everything is in order. There is a driving range there and small putting and chipping facilities. It is a flat course so relatively easy to walk but carts will be available.
Groups
First Tee Time Sherk(21) Grundy(17), Garries(9), Abercrombie(11)
Second Tee Time Taylor(16) Maynard(17), Player(19), Alexander(21)
Third Tee Time Davidson(24) Volpatti(23), Burns(11), Cain(17)
Fourth Tee Time Borland(9), Walter(18), Watt(?), Comer(11)
Fifth Tee Time Madsen(7), Sidonio(20), Leigh(25), Brown(17)
Bold name in each group is captain. Please ensure everyone in the group knows the rules of the game
The Game - Lone Wolf
The premise of the game is that someone is the wolf and gets to pick their partner. As each golfer tees off, the wolf decides whether to pick that golfer as their partner, or wait for the next golfer to tee off.
When the first golfer tees off, the wolf decides if that will be their partner.
When the second golfer tees off, the wolf can no longer pick the first golfer and decides if the second golfer is their partner.
When the third golfer tees off, the wolf can no longer pick the first nor second golfer as their partner. The wolf makes a decision at this point whether to pick the third person as their partner or to go it alone as the lone wolf. The lone wolf at this point must let out a piercing wolf howl to let everyone on the course know there is a lone wolf on the prowl.
The wolf tees off last.
If the wolf picks a partner, the wolf and the partner must beat, no ties, the other two players to win the hole otherwise the other pair win the hole. (1 point each for the two winners)
If the wolf decides to be the lone wolf, the wolf's score must beat, no ties, all the other players to win the hole, otherwise the other three win the hole. (3 points to the lone wolf if he wins and none to the losers. 1 point each to the others if the lone wolf loses or ties)
Keep track of the winner(s) on each hole and add up at the points at the end. The player with the most points is the Lone Wolf winner.
* a reminder that all scores used should be net scores
The premise of the game is that someone is the wolf and gets to pick their partner. As each golfer tees off, the wolf decides whether to pick that golfer as their partner, or wait for the next golfer to tee off.
When the first golfer tees off, the wolf decides if that will be their partner.
When the second golfer tees off, the wolf can no longer pick the first golfer and decides if the second golfer is their partner.
When the third golfer tees off, the wolf can no longer pick the first nor second golfer as their partner. The wolf makes a decision at this point whether to pick the third person as their partner or to go it alone as the lone wolf. The lone wolf at this point must let out a piercing wolf howl to let everyone on the course know there is a lone wolf on the prowl.
The wolf tees off last.
If the wolf picks a partner, the wolf and the partner must beat, no ties, the other two players to win the hole otherwise the other pair win the hole. (1 point each for the two winners)
If the wolf decides to be the lone wolf, the wolf's score must beat, no ties, all the other players to win the hole, otherwise the other three win the hole. (3 points to the lone wolf if he wins and none to the losers. 1 point each to the others if the lone wolf loses or ties)
Keep track of the winner(s) on each hole and add up at the points at the end. The player with the most points is the Lone Wolf winner.
* a reminder that all scores used should be net scores
Down The Middle
Olympic Champions!
On a gorgeous sunny, South Surrey morning - a day that renewed everyone’s faith that there will be a return to summer, the highly vaunted duo of Coach Abercrombie and Stats Grundy dominated the field at Northview. The pair finished one-two in the points parade then drew each other in the pair drawing. Can’t argue with that success. Grundy is off to a record braking start this season and Coach A diminished his chances of being asked to return by scooping up more than his share from the prize table. Well done, Coach!
The afternoon also saw the return of Hugh Taylor, Peter Sidonio, Doug Player and the ever popular Whizzer Backie. Great to hear the dulcet tones and acerbic wit of the Whizzer announcing the prize winners - a job well done by the Bakester and oft missed. Player’s return was also welcomed by all but he obviously has been away from the game because he was not at the KP table nor did he come in with his usual net 65. Perhaps he is saving that for a more meaningful time in the season. He has to be commended, however, for the dutiful payment of his sanction. Well done, Beerhead! It also must be mentioned that there was a good deal of angst and dismay expressed over the placement of his name on the coveted green jacket as last year’s winner. The language used to express dismay at his action is not appropriate to repeat here. Beerhead continues to leave his mark among men.
Nothing much to say about Huge other than he is still Huge, but it was great to have his smiling face, easy going nature and average golf back among this group of average golfers. Great to see you back in the fold, Hugh.
Peter returned after a year’s leave of absence to earn the money he needed to keep his wife in the form to which she has been so accustomed. Obviously, the prize table at these PGA events hasn’t been quite good enough for him. He did, however, work his anus off on the course giving a lot of blood, a little sweat and maybe even the occasional tear out there.
At the Prize Table
The big winner of the day was Coach Abercrombie whose 16 Olympic points was the highest of the day followed very closely by Stats Grundy with 15. Then the two drew each other as partners after! How unfair was that! Two weeks in a row for Stretch as a big winner at the prize table. Low net from out of nowhere was Richard “the Stork” Ostereicher with a net 66. Well done, Richard! The next closest score was a net 70 from Peter “Zorro” Sidonio - the dark, debonair mystery man. Low net for the day was from Dale “ZZ Top” Borland with a nifty 81 showing just how tough the course was playing. The other winner for the day was none other than, Moi, who won the KP just showing that no one else could hit that green. However, it should be stated that Hugh Taylor actually was closer to the pin but he three putted negating his victory. How unusual for neither Player nor Taylor to win that prize.
Wearing the Jacket
The race for the very coveted Green Jacket is turning into a very interesting affair after our early results. Leading the pack is the surprising Digby Leigh who is simply showing that money can buy a golf swing. He has been very steady shooting net 73’s in both his first two events for a smooth 146. Right on his tail with a net 147 is Vic Grundy who is off to a torrid start this season as demonstrated by his regular trips to the prize table. There is a very large group well within reach only a few shots behind those two. The only two that are lagging behind are both “gamesmen” Alex and Bruce, who obviously have had their noses far too deep in the corporate books and need to get out more often and enjoy the fresh air. Still a long way to go in the race boyz, but don’t fall too far behind or you could be in for deep ridicule. Only a couple more weeks of tax season, then no excuses!
19th Hole
There was almost universal praise for the course at Northview. The first time playing there for the tour proved to be a winner for everyone even though it was quite a challenge. Perhaps the weather for the day had a bearing on everyone’s opinion but as challenging as it was and not even in mid summer shape, it is still a course to which we should return.
Finally, some discussion ensued regarding our charitable donation. It was generally agreed (actually, there was no dissent) that we should continue our charitable endeavor but in a reduced way. Since our scheduling guru has done such an excellent job of working our finances, we will have a surplus this season. Some of that surplus will be funneled right back into our group as we look after ourselves. We will continue to raise money for a local charity but we will look after ourselves as well. Your executive has a few things in mind.
Great to get out and golf with all of you and look forward to seeing you in a couple of weeks at Squamish!
Olympic Champions!
On a gorgeous sunny, South Surrey morning - a day that renewed everyone’s faith that there will be a return to summer, the highly vaunted duo of Coach Abercrombie and Stats Grundy dominated the field at Northview. The pair finished one-two in the points parade then drew each other in the pair drawing. Can’t argue with that success. Grundy is off to a record braking start this season and Coach A diminished his chances of being asked to return by scooping up more than his share from the prize table. Well done, Coach!
The afternoon also saw the return of Hugh Taylor, Peter Sidonio, Doug Player and the ever popular Whizzer Backie. Great to hear the dulcet tones and acerbic wit of the Whizzer announcing the prize winners - a job well done by the Bakester and oft missed. Player’s return was also welcomed by all but he obviously has been away from the game because he was not at the KP table nor did he come in with his usual net 65. Perhaps he is saving that for a more meaningful time in the season. He has to be commended, however, for the dutiful payment of his sanction. Well done, Beerhead! It also must be mentioned that there was a good deal of angst and dismay expressed over the placement of his name on the coveted green jacket as last year’s winner. The language used to express dismay at his action is not appropriate to repeat here. Beerhead continues to leave his mark among men.
Nothing much to say about Huge other than he is still Huge, but it was great to have his smiling face, easy going nature and average golf back among this group of average golfers. Great to see you back in the fold, Hugh.
Peter returned after a year’s leave of absence to earn the money he needed to keep his wife in the form to which she has been so accustomed. Obviously, the prize table at these PGA events hasn’t been quite good enough for him. He did, however, work his anus off on the course giving a lot of blood, a little sweat and maybe even the occasional tear out there.
At the Prize Table
The big winner of the day was Coach Abercrombie whose 16 Olympic points was the highest of the day followed very closely by Stats Grundy with 15. Then the two drew each other as partners after! How unfair was that! Two weeks in a row for Stretch as a big winner at the prize table. Low net from out of nowhere was Richard “the Stork” Ostereicher with a net 66. Well done, Richard! The next closest score was a net 70 from Peter “Zorro” Sidonio - the dark, debonair mystery man. Low net for the day was from Dale “ZZ Top” Borland with a nifty 81 showing just how tough the course was playing. The other winner for the day was none other than, Moi, who won the KP just showing that no one else could hit that green. However, it should be stated that Hugh Taylor actually was closer to the pin but he three putted negating his victory. How unusual for neither Player nor Taylor to win that prize.
Wearing the Jacket
The race for the very coveted Green Jacket is turning into a very interesting affair after our early results. Leading the pack is the surprising Digby Leigh who is simply showing that money can buy a golf swing. He has been very steady shooting net 73’s in both his first two events for a smooth 146. Right on his tail with a net 147 is Vic Grundy who is off to a torrid start this season as demonstrated by his regular trips to the prize table. There is a very large group well within reach only a few shots behind those two. The only two that are lagging behind are both “gamesmen” Alex and Bruce, who obviously have had their noses far too deep in the corporate books and need to get out more often and enjoy the fresh air. Still a long way to go in the race boyz, but don’t fall too far behind or you could be in for deep ridicule. Only a couple more weeks of tax season, then no excuses!
19th Hole
There was almost universal praise for the course at Northview. The first time playing there for the tour proved to be a winner for everyone even though it was quite a challenge. Perhaps the weather for the day had a bearing on everyone’s opinion but as challenging as it was and not even in mid summer shape, it is still a course to which we should return.
Finally, some discussion ensued regarding our charitable donation. It was generally agreed (actually, there was no dissent) that we should continue our charitable endeavor but in a reduced way. Since our scheduling guru has done such an excellent job of working our finances, we will have a surplus this season. Some of that surplus will be funneled right back into our group as we look after ourselves. We will continue to raise money for a local charity but we will look after ourselves as well. Your executive has a few things in mind.
Great to get out and golf with all of you and look forward to seeing you in a couple of weeks at Squamish!
From the Rough - April 7, 2014
Grundy Races to the Early Lead in the Race for the Green Jacket!
The golfing gods were not kind to many of the members of the PGA on opening day of the 2014 season. However, the hearty bunch that we are, we endured the winds and the heavy rains and a few members even excelled! Lead by Stretch Grundy, the group of Grundy, Leigh, Odendaal and Sherk braved the weather to shoot a remarkable -15 on a day that would challenge even a dedicated Scottish golfer on Kings Links. Close behind The Stretch shooting a net 73 was the greatly improved Shyster Leigh showing off his newly purchased golf swing. Odendaal and Sherk, who managed to complete his round despite the fact he had some hair out of place, were solid in support. Minus 15 would have left all the other groups well in the dust if there was any.
Kim Madsen’s magnificent 77 lead the low gross - a score that was quite remarkable considering the conditions. He was a full 7 strokes ahead of his next closest competitor, the aforementioned Grundy. Several others put in very solid rounds including Shifty Dave Alexander with a net 74, the quiet but deadly Steve Cain with a net 73, and the ever present pitbull Bob Garries with a nifty net 74. Those who struggled shall remain unnamed - basically, the rest of us.
Sanctions were given but not applied after the first round and shall carry over until they are paid or forgiven. The most egregious sanction was last year’s winner, who traditionally hits the first tee shot of the season and who boycotted the event, was fined two pitchers of beer. He will have to pay if he ever shows up again. The second sanction was applied to the winning group of Grundy, Sherk, Leigh and Odendaal, a dubious group if ever there was one, was sanctioned two pitchers of beer for slow play. But after revue, since they were obviously grinding over every shot in order to shoot so well, the sanction has been amended to one pitcher of beer at the next event and an extra pitcher of beer from Sherk who is attempting to duck his fine by missing the next event.
Finally, despite the soggy conditions, the course was in remarkably good condition and the staff treated us very well. Everyone who stayed for the debriefing seemed to enjoy themselves and the stories and laughs were maintained despite our sogginess. Off to a good start! Many thanks to the Junior Tibble and Sidonio for very capably filling in for your seniors.
On The Green
A couple of reminders, gentlemen. Pace of play is important on the course and we are generally very good but always keep it in mind. Triples are the most that we can take on any given hole so once you have reached that stage of frustration, just pick up your ball and move on. And don’t forget the PGA rule for no out of bounds or no lost balls on any course. Those balls will eventually be found by someone and every ball that is temporarily misplaced shall be played as a lateral hazard and dropped where it enters the hazard, (not where you would like to drop it) with a one stroke penalty. Gimmes are for balls inside 18 inches only (Player!) All other putts must be made!
Don’t forget to maintain your handicaps and post your scores on MyScorecard.
Next on the Tee
Our next event is at Northview (Ridge) in South Surrey, a course that is new to the PGA. The first tee time is 9:27 so everyone please be there by 9:00 am. Don’t casually stroll in at your appointed tee time like the team Sherk and Leigh did last week. Sometimes we have to make adjustments so everyone needs to be there.
Groups
1. Leigh(25), Taylor(16), Walters(18), Ostereicher(24)
2. Player(19), Cain(17), Borland(8), Al Maynard(17)
3. Killeen(15), Sidonio(20), Backie(16), Garries(13)
4. Alexander(21), Burns(11), Volpatti(23), Goulding(20)
5. Brown(16), Davidson(23), Madsen(6), Grundy(16)
The Game
Olympic
This is a putting game: points are awarded for chip ins and one putts only. Each individual keeps his score and a blind draw at the end of the round determines the winning team. Points are awarded as follows:
4 pts - farthest from the hole
3 pts - next longest putt
2 pts - next longest putt
1 pt - shortest putt
5 pts for a shot made from off the putting surface. If this occurs, then the 4 pointer is eliminated.
Grundy Races to the Early Lead in the Race for the Green Jacket!
The golfing gods were not kind to many of the members of the PGA on opening day of the 2014 season. However, the hearty bunch that we are, we endured the winds and the heavy rains and a few members even excelled! Lead by Stretch Grundy, the group of Grundy, Leigh, Odendaal and Sherk braved the weather to shoot a remarkable -15 on a day that would challenge even a dedicated Scottish golfer on Kings Links. Close behind The Stretch shooting a net 73 was the greatly improved Shyster Leigh showing off his newly purchased golf swing. Odendaal and Sherk, who managed to complete his round despite the fact he had some hair out of place, were solid in support. Minus 15 would have left all the other groups well in the dust if there was any.
Kim Madsen’s magnificent 77 lead the low gross - a score that was quite remarkable considering the conditions. He was a full 7 strokes ahead of his next closest competitor, the aforementioned Grundy. Several others put in very solid rounds including Shifty Dave Alexander with a net 74, the quiet but deadly Steve Cain with a net 73, and the ever present pitbull Bob Garries with a nifty net 74. Those who struggled shall remain unnamed - basically, the rest of us.
Sanctions were given but not applied after the first round and shall carry over until they are paid or forgiven. The most egregious sanction was last year’s winner, who traditionally hits the first tee shot of the season and who boycotted the event, was fined two pitchers of beer. He will have to pay if he ever shows up again. The second sanction was applied to the winning group of Grundy, Sherk, Leigh and Odendaal, a dubious group if ever there was one, was sanctioned two pitchers of beer for slow play. But after revue, since they were obviously grinding over every shot in order to shoot so well, the sanction has been amended to one pitcher of beer at the next event and an extra pitcher of beer from Sherk who is attempting to duck his fine by missing the next event.
Finally, despite the soggy conditions, the course was in remarkably good condition and the staff treated us very well. Everyone who stayed for the debriefing seemed to enjoy themselves and the stories and laughs were maintained despite our sogginess. Off to a good start! Many thanks to the Junior Tibble and Sidonio for very capably filling in for your seniors.
On The Green
A couple of reminders, gentlemen. Pace of play is important on the course and we are generally very good but always keep it in mind. Triples are the most that we can take on any given hole so once you have reached that stage of frustration, just pick up your ball and move on. And don’t forget the PGA rule for no out of bounds or no lost balls on any course. Those balls will eventually be found by someone and every ball that is temporarily misplaced shall be played as a lateral hazard and dropped where it enters the hazard, (not where you would like to drop it) with a one stroke penalty. Gimmes are for balls inside 18 inches only (Player!) All other putts must be made!
Don’t forget to maintain your handicaps and post your scores on MyScorecard.
Next on the Tee
Our next event is at Northview (Ridge) in South Surrey, a course that is new to the PGA. The first tee time is 9:27 so everyone please be there by 9:00 am. Don’t casually stroll in at your appointed tee time like the team Sherk and Leigh did last week. Sometimes we have to make adjustments so everyone needs to be there.
Groups
1. Leigh(25), Taylor(16), Walters(18), Ostereicher(24)
2. Player(19), Cain(17), Borland(8), Al Maynard(17)
3. Killeen(15), Sidonio(20), Backie(16), Garries(13)
4. Alexander(21), Burns(11), Volpatti(23), Goulding(20)
5. Brown(16), Davidson(23), Madsen(6), Grundy(16)
The Game
Olympic
This is a putting game: points are awarded for chip ins and one putts only. Each individual keeps his score and a blind draw at the end of the round determines the winning team. Points are awarded as follows:
4 pts - farthest from the hole
3 pts - next longest putt
2 pts - next longest putt
1 pt - shortest putt
5 pts for a shot made from off the putting surface. If this occurs, then the 4 pointer is eliminated.
Out of the Rough - March 31, 2014
Gentlemen or the like:
Welcome to what I believe is the 19th year of PGA operation. During that storied and sordid history, the PGA has seen numerous changes and transformations but some things have remained constant: a membership’s love of golf and honourable competition and the willingness to sandbag, cheat, humiliate and belittle all in pursuit of the coveted green jacket at year’s end. The names have changed over the years but the fun and good times have remained the same. Now it’s time to let the fun begin once again.
After a somewhat tumultuous off season in which we lost our beloved commissioner to the evils of woman and marriage, the strength of the PGA membership once again surfaced. Out of chaos has arisen order. Instead of an omnipotent Commissioner, we now have a collective group of expertise prepared to carry on our traditions and with that, I believe we have an even stronger PGA. But let’s see how the year unfolds.
The leadership group got together yesterday to finalize some of the details and see what else might be missing. The group in charge of the prizes would like to know the selection of games during the year so they can organize the distribution of prizes. So as soon as you can give them that info, please do so. Financial statements apparently are in order so far but Vic will be doing his forensic auditing as we move forward. Our main concern right now is filling the remaining three spots on the road trip but those may fill quickly as the weather warms and as we get closer to the date.
As you know, we are trying a couple of new ideas this year, one being the road trip and another is new courses including some repeat courses during the year. This will all be up for review at the end of the year but in the meantime - no whining! (Maybe that’s too much to ask!) It is what it is.
We now have posted the Roles and Responsibilities along with the volunteers in charge. (PS check the list out so you can be reminded of that for which you are responsible!) This should help ensure smooth operation during the year and more importantly will give a foundation for future leadership should any of the present leadership succumb to other outside distractions or say screw all you guys.
I think we should also have a page of potential games that can be played so anyone new to that task has somewhere to start. I would also like to see a group photographer who could keep a little visual flavor of what is going on in the PGA. So if anyone would like to take that on, jump in.
Steve has taken over the website controls so you will see his flavor on this year’s website. The good news is that we still have a website which has been a truly great addition to the continuity of this group despite being the Luddites that some of us are.
So, many thanks to Steve. On that note, many thanks to all of you who have jumped forward and offered to do your part of keeping this thing going! http://pretendga.weebly.com/ Bookmark this link
I am looking forward to the upcoming year and I have heard from several of you who are very positive about the direction we have taken. With that, let the games and the name calling begin. I think everyone even Digby is on an official handicap site so we all start even. BTW - We will be playing the white tees in our events this year. Good luck everyone! Stay healthy! Looking forward to a great season.
Gentlemen or the like:
Welcome to what I believe is the 19th year of PGA operation. During that storied and sordid history, the PGA has seen numerous changes and transformations but some things have remained constant: a membership’s love of golf and honourable competition and the willingness to sandbag, cheat, humiliate and belittle all in pursuit of the coveted green jacket at year’s end. The names have changed over the years but the fun and good times have remained the same. Now it’s time to let the fun begin once again.
After a somewhat tumultuous off season in which we lost our beloved commissioner to the evils of woman and marriage, the strength of the PGA membership once again surfaced. Out of chaos has arisen order. Instead of an omnipotent Commissioner, we now have a collective group of expertise prepared to carry on our traditions and with that, I believe we have an even stronger PGA. But let’s see how the year unfolds.
The leadership group got together yesterday to finalize some of the details and see what else might be missing. The group in charge of the prizes would like to know the selection of games during the year so they can organize the distribution of prizes. So as soon as you can give them that info, please do so. Financial statements apparently are in order so far but Vic will be doing his forensic auditing as we move forward. Our main concern right now is filling the remaining three spots on the road trip but those may fill quickly as the weather warms and as we get closer to the date.
As you know, we are trying a couple of new ideas this year, one being the road trip and another is new courses including some repeat courses during the year. This will all be up for review at the end of the year but in the meantime - no whining! (Maybe that’s too much to ask!) It is what it is.
We now have posted the Roles and Responsibilities along with the volunteers in charge. (PS check the list out so you can be reminded of that for which you are responsible!) This should help ensure smooth operation during the year and more importantly will give a foundation for future leadership should any of the present leadership succumb to other outside distractions or say screw all you guys.
I think we should also have a page of potential games that can be played so anyone new to that task has somewhere to start. I would also like to see a group photographer who could keep a little visual flavor of what is going on in the PGA. So if anyone would like to take that on, jump in.
Steve has taken over the website controls so you will see his flavor on this year’s website. The good news is that we still have a website which has been a truly great addition to the continuity of this group despite being the Luddites that some of us are.
So, many thanks to Steve. On that note, many thanks to all of you who have jumped forward and offered to do your part of keeping this thing going! http://pretendga.weebly.com/ Bookmark this link
I am looking forward to the upcoming year and I have heard from several of you who are very positive about the direction we have taken. With that, let the games and the name calling begin. I think everyone even Digby is on an official handicap site so we all start even. BTW - We will be playing the white tees in our events this year. Good luck everyone! Stay healthy! Looking forward to a great season.
Opening Day Foursomes
Opening day is at Kings Links which is right next to the Boundary Bay Airport. The first tee time is 10:03 am so please get there by 9:30 so we can get ourselves organized. There are pretty good practice facilities there with a driving range and short game section if you wish to go a little earlier. The wind will probably be a major factor.
April 5 Foursomes (Captains in bold)
1. Brown, Alexander, Cain, Garries
2. Grundy, Leigh, Odendaal, Sherk
3. Borland, Tibble, Walters, Burns
4. Madsen, Davidson, Goulding, Killeen
5. Volpatti, Sidonio, Ostereicher, White
Week 1 - The Game
Vienna
It’s as easy as one, two, three.
On hole #1 the best low net is counted; on hole #2 the best two low nets are counted; on hole #3 the best three low nets are counted. On hole #4 we start again with only the low net. Then we keep repeating the pattern: one, two, three through all 18 holes.
February 2, 2014 Update
Gentlemen,
First of all, thank you everyone for your very quick response and financial commitment to our organization. I take it as a very good indication of the health of the group. However, it has created a bit of a dilemma for us. We actually had 19 people who indicated they wanted to play for 16 available spots but, as you all know, indicating your desire and showing a financial commitment are two separate things. There were 18 of you who got your money in by Friday afternoon or contacted us to say you were out of town but guaranteed their dues. We actually had 19 but Hugh Taylor had to withdraw ant the last moment due to work commitments.18 does not fit into 4 tee times very well.
Your executive met briefly yesterday (on the course) to discuss our options. The first thing we would like to do is try to recruit 2 more players to bring our numbers to 20 and get one more tee each week. So please, could you all do your best to get someone else to join this elite group of competitors. Let's give it a week an see where we are before we go to another plan. Everyone do your best and use the website as a recruitment tool to show prospective members what we are all about. If you find someone, let me know right away so I can keep everyone informed
PS One of the options we discussed was everyone sitting out one week leaving 16 total spaces to fill. Those 16 spaces would be filled by the two extras each week. Another was dropping the two highest nets from each week (they obviously could use the week off for extra practice) to be filled by the two who missed the week before.
Any other suggestions would be gratefully accepted.
Get busy and recruit!!!
Dick
--
illegitimus non carborundum
January 30, 2014 Update
Gentlemen,
Your executive committee has been working hard on your behalf getting ready for the upcoming season so I will give you a summary of where we are. First and foremost, it is time for you to show your commitment and that means paying your dues! Just so you are all aware, there are 17 of you who want to play this season and there are spaces for only 16 players. So the first 16 people who get their money int Paul Killeen will be our regulars, the 17th will go onto the spares list. So either deliver your $750 to Paul personally or mail a cheque to his address:
Paul Killeen
2816 Trillium Place
North Van, BC
V7H 1J4
There are 4 of us who have paid already.
So get your money in right away!
The Schedule
The schedule is now confirmed and in place. I will attach it to this email for your records. The fees will include carts at Northlands and at Crowne Isle. But at all the other venues you will be on your own to walk or hire a cart.
The Road Trip
We have booked rounds and rooms for 20 people at Crowne Isle which means we will have space for 4 invitees on that trip. We hope we can get those 4 from our spares list including our former commissioner, so please consider joining us there. The cost will be about $150 for a shared room for two nights and $70 per round green fees which is $20 off regular price. (Those green fees are covered in the dues for the regulars but the room is not.) Once there, there is no driving. Some cooking facilities in each room and a restaurant on site with our group booking the restaurant for the Saturday night. The accommodations are first class and everyone can stay together. I am really looking forward to it, so spares, book early if you can make it. Paul will have a form for you to sign in.
Prizes
Bob has a god start on the prizes that will be awarded at each tournament for the season. Those prizes will be awarded for your $10 bet before the round which will be collected by the captains at each event. In addition, winners each week will have and additional entry into the yearend draw for the tax receipt. Your name also goes into the hat for your payment of your dues. One additional entry will go to the winner of the coveted Green Jacket. (Player, don't forget to return it before you depart for exotic climes!)
Jobs and Role Descriptions
Only a few .volunteered for any of the jobs after my last email so I will be forced to assign some of those tasks. I will attach the Role Descriptions to this email as week which I will ask our web masters to post on the website for current and future members to peruse.
Finances
Paul has volunteered to look after the finances including a budget and keeping of the financial records for everyone to see. That way everyone can see where their money is going and there are no mysteries. We will need an auditor at some point just to keep tabs on Paul. ( I have seen his math). That is why the payments will go to Paul and he will be in charge of the bill payments except the bar bill at the end of each round. We still need someone to do that - a small job that someone can take on. Just spreads the responsibilities around so no one person has a lot to do.
Charity
The charity still has not been decided although Brownie has made a suggestion. If any of you have any other suggestions, please forward them to the group. The executive will decide. Remember, the charity is just an aside to our main purpose but it does give us something more noble to aim for as a group - another grander purpose that we can tell others about or give as an excuse to our wives when we spend some Saturdays golfing. The only immediate fundraising is done by budgeting $120 for prizes at each event and collecting $160; and whatever we have left over at the bar after we have paid the bills. In the past, the other main fundraiser has been donation of the Calcutta money at the end of the year but that is voluntary. If any of you have any other good ideas, please pass them along.
Attachments
I have attached 3 items: the season schedule, the registration form to be returned to Paul and the Roles and Responsibilities ( a couple still to be filled )
Looking forward to the upcoming season. Now, hopefully, the weather will cooperate!
Get your cheques in! First 16!
Dick
-
illegitimus non carborundum
Your executive committee has been working hard on your behalf getting ready for the upcoming season so I will give you a summary of where we are. First and foremost, it is time for you to show your commitment and that means paying your dues! Just so you are all aware, there are 17 of you who want to play this season and there are spaces for only 16 players. So the first 16 people who get their money int Paul Killeen will be our regulars, the 17th will go onto the spares list. So either deliver your $750 to Paul personally or mail a cheque to his address:
Paul Killeen
2816 Trillium Place
North Van, BC
V7H 1J4
There are 4 of us who have paid already.
So get your money in right away!
The Schedule
The schedule is now confirmed and in place. I will attach it to this email for your records. The fees will include carts at Northlands and at Crowne Isle. But at all the other venues you will be on your own to walk or hire a cart.
The Road Trip
We have booked rounds and rooms for 20 people at Crowne Isle which means we will have space for 4 invitees on that trip. We hope we can get those 4 from our spares list including our former commissioner, so please consider joining us there. The cost will be about $150 for a shared room for two nights and $70 per round green fees which is $20 off regular price. (Those green fees are covered in the dues for the regulars but the room is not.) Once there, there is no driving. Some cooking facilities in each room and a restaurant on site with our group booking the restaurant for the Saturday night. The accommodations are first class and everyone can stay together. I am really looking forward to it, so spares, book early if you can make it. Paul will have a form for you to sign in.
Prizes
Bob has a god start on the prizes that will be awarded at each tournament for the season. Those prizes will be awarded for your $10 bet before the round which will be collected by the captains at each event. In addition, winners each week will have and additional entry into the yearend draw for the tax receipt. Your name also goes into the hat for your payment of your dues. One additional entry will go to the winner of the coveted Green Jacket. (Player, don't forget to return it before you depart for exotic climes!)
Jobs and Role Descriptions
Only a few .volunteered for any of the jobs after my last email so I will be forced to assign some of those tasks. I will attach the Role Descriptions to this email as week which I will ask our web masters to post on the website for current and future members to peruse.
Finances
Paul has volunteered to look after the finances including a budget and keeping of the financial records for everyone to see. That way everyone can see where their money is going and there are no mysteries. We will need an auditor at some point just to keep tabs on Paul. ( I have seen his math). That is why the payments will go to Paul and he will be in charge of the bill payments except the bar bill at the end of each round. We still need someone to do that - a small job that someone can take on. Just spreads the responsibilities around so no one person has a lot to do.
Charity
The charity still has not been decided although Brownie has made a suggestion. If any of you have any other suggestions, please forward them to the group. The executive will decide. Remember, the charity is just an aside to our main purpose but it does give us something more noble to aim for as a group - another grander purpose that we can tell others about or give as an excuse to our wives when we spend some Saturdays golfing. The only immediate fundraising is done by budgeting $120 for prizes at each event and collecting $160; and whatever we have left over at the bar after we have paid the bills. In the past, the other main fundraiser has been donation of the Calcutta money at the end of the year but that is voluntary. If any of you have any other good ideas, please pass them along.
Attachments
I have attached 3 items: the season schedule, the registration form to be returned to Paul and the Roles and Responsibilities ( a couple still to be filled )
Looking forward to the upcoming season. Now, hopefully, the weather will cooperate!
Get your cheques in! First 16!
Dick
-
illegitimus non carborundum